It's a 2008 Christmas, Bitch!

(In the style of Lil Bowow)

Christmas this year was better than any other,
Not because of road trips or presents and bows.
But mostly cause I didn't have to bother
With any of those crazy biatches and hos

That I'm usually forced to talk to this time of year
I know that sounds harsh but wait till you hear
Metrosexual meth head Uncle say "time for the telling
Of all the secrets you find most humiliating!"
Watch as embittered still-single-and-mid-forties Rel (ative)
Chimes in with comments most tittilating
About how everyone's going to hell,
Because they don't know that marriage is law.
Ah, these are the Holidays I've known so well.
Oh, yeah I almost forgot: Tra la la.

Now, just keep in mind direct family is excepted
From the crazy debaucherous stuff mentioned here
And for their own good, I wish they'd accepted
A ride out of Crazy Town, Destination: Here.
But instead they wanted to all be together
Even if that meant putting up with insanity.
Then again, maybe I'd have been there too
If I had a less tenuous hold on humanity.

Instead, however, this year was pleasant.
(And not just because I got some kick ass presents)
Without extended drama or perilous roads
It was nice to be able to lighten my load
By shopping and sleeping in and writing and stuff.

Although I didn't do much, it was 'just enough'
To leave me thinking of all the things I treasure
And help me remember small things give pleasure
When you pay attention and delight in small ways
It's easy enough to find happiness in each day.

And, though it sounds cheesy and a little cliche',
I wouldn't have spent this Christmas any other way.